Big Loser

I haven’t been focusing on weightloss and fitness. Depression and moving to a new city had shifted priorities for a long time. When I got out of the hospital I started fitness again. Then I moved to Toronto and I began to stop exercising.

I did not have a neighbor to motivate me for fitness. My neighbour was invaluable in Orillia for driving me to the gym and cheering me on. I lost the fitness buddies when I moved to Toronto.

Thats why I’m here again. I’m friendless in my fitness efforts.

Some people say I’m slender or slim already and I do not need to lose weight. They say that I have issues with my body. I look good already. I do not agree.

I could lose my belly fat, which I’m able to hide through lose clothing. Also most of my fat is stored in my upper legs. My legs are rather muscular but my torso remains lanky and I want to work on it. I’ve never had a flat stomach or abs since I was 8 years old. I did not have a large chest except for manboobs when I weight 260 lbs.

I’ve started to think about becoming a model but that got put on hold with not exercising and moving. I had trouble finding accommodation. Now I struggle to eat healthy far from home in my daily travels. I eat a fast food take out restaurants choosing healthy chicken burgers without mayo but indulging in ice cream.

Ice cream eating started this summer as a symbol to attract other men. But then I just ate ice cream because I liked it. The erotic symbolism of licking a vanilla cone lost its novelty. Though  I still see desperate homosexuals in the gay district in Toronto.

My budget is limited as I took a hit in pay. My parents no longer shop for me. Food is my own concern but now its hard to buy good food on a budget.

For example I had to eat macaroni Tuesday and Spaggetti and meatballs tonight. Cheap food.

I have a bag of produce from the foodbank that I’ve yet to break into. There is still left over spaghetti in the fridge.

Lets make this short to read. Money is a concern for fitness. I have to eat within a budget. Not making lunches makes my diet suffer. Ice cream is junk food which I eat. Fast food is a problem.

I need to get into fitness too. I have a YMCA membership I’ve yet to use it often in town. My jobs are becoming more frequent so I burn calories by my physically demanding job as a painter. It also eats time for fitness which I spend at my computer instead of fitness.

I really want to run tonight that is why I’m doing this (writing). I want to get back into the routine. I don’t know if I’ll run tonight or tomorrow. We’ll seee.

I have lost 20 lbs again. I went from 210 to 190. This is good. I have been going to the gym 3 times a week. This is much more effective than just jogging though weight loss is less. I’m starting to get abs. I can see it. I feel great. The gym is so relaxing. I meet more people doing it.

Eating healthy veggies and lean meat learning new recipies like rice salad.

SE 12 09

I ran yesterday though stretching/running took one hour. The first lap around the park was fast, the second slower. The park got scary as it got darker, but I used this fear to run faster.

I really felt worked Yesterday. I did not do upper body exercises.

I also ran 1 lap today, but had to slow to a very painfully slow jog because of stomach cramps. I did not eat that much. Only a handful of whole wheat chips and a banana before my jog. Today’s attempt at jogging was a disaster. Its okay I have completed 4 jogs this week, it is all that is required. I believe I only did upper body exercises once or twice this week. This is not enough to build muscle.

I am concerned about controlling what I eat and planing meals carefully but I have yet to set aside time to track this seriously.

This morning I weighed in at 194. I gained weight throughout the day as  I consumed water and food. This is a promising sign that the weight is starting to finally come off.

Mother bakes a pie today. Oh dear. 

I have to confess I ate out last week twice because I did not make a lunch. I had two chicken salad sandwich deals  with chicken noodle soup last week. I also had a veggie burger at burger king with a garden salad -light ranch dressing.

I continue to drink half a pot of coffee each day. I know this is excessive, but back in August I cut the coffee and I was tired, miserable, and exhausted. This was not the only reason for that mood.

I do not believe I  drank any pop last week except on Monday when I went to burger king.

I could cut the allegedly “healthy” fast food if I made proper lunches.

I jogged 2 laps around the park. It was sunny today just as it was yesterday. For some reason I arrived home 10 minutes earlier than usual, but I did not feel I was jogging that fast. I did run with a burst of speed in the last lap, a victory lap, that is all. Perhaps some day I will be able to run a whole lap without stopping. After running, I did not feel worked or exhausted either.

I have some injuries/complaints today:

1. The muscles on my left leg below the knee were sore as I stretched, trying to touch my toes. The muscle could have felt this way because I did not properly stretch after running yesterday. I tried to massage this muscle before running but it did not help. After running the muscle was not as sore, when I stretched, perhaps due to adrenaline.

2. While running I felt soreness between the left shoulder and neck, this went away as I ran.

3. The below the right rib was slightly painful as I ran, these pains cause me to slow down. I wish they would stop.

After cardio I completed:

20 sit-ups, slow movements, hands over ears, elbows forward.

10 push-ups feet elevated one step on staircase. Poor form, could not press all the way down, to touch floor, still better than last attempt. Back kept straight.

10 rapid crunches.

There were lots of good looking people in the park today. Lots of people being athletic, was inspiring.

Yesterday I jogged in the hot sun for 2 laps for 1 hour around 3PM. It was about 26C. Pretty hot. So I jogged slower than usual. However in the final lap I ran about 1/4 at a higher speed than usual. I took 591 MLs of water with me and I finished the entire bottle during my jog. There was not familiar faces or words of encouragement from the people I passed by. There were a lot of European and Asian tourists in the park as I jogged yesterday. None said hi. Well, I didn’t either, so meh. There were also several families, and dog walkers in this park. This is not a park for 20 somethings, I didn’t see any except a half dozen playing volleyball, there was a baseball game occurring from in the park, I could here the cheers from the bleachers as I jogged.

I hope I am able to improve my intensity and speed soon.

I also hoped to get some strength exercises done yesterday, but procrastinated.

The new condo next to the park is nearing completion, the construction company has poured cement up to the 7th floor, and is completed cement pouring it seems. The crane has been removed, and some basic landscaping is starting. The exterior walls and windows are being put in, the building appear to have pipes and electrical connections being installed on the lower floors as well. I would enter the site to take a private tour, but there is always someone watching the site from the manager’s trailer. Also tours of the construction occur on weekends for qualified condo buyers. A young boy wears a sign with an arrow saying “waterfront condos” next to the highway as I jog. This condo will be one of the tallest buildings in the city to date. The town council has extended the maximum height allowed for buildings for this condo. Town council always caves into big developers. I believe they would not do this for low-income housing construction.

I am going to jog today, the only question is when. Hopefully I will have something to report, something more brief too.

Exercise Log

Jogged today for 1 hr. Weight in @ 201 LBS. Good news.

Yesterday was hard to control eating, hard than usual. I was very anxious about my assignments and exams as the school year finishes up. I was reading academic paper after paper. Looking at my thesis question and topic question I started wondering if it was good enough. I looked at the structure of my paper and more worries. I was at home most of the day so I started getting hungry, the fridge was near. Trying hard to stay away from everything I just couldn’t, I kept thinking about eating. Everytime I thought about food I had a cup of water. If I had a nickle for every cup of water I had I would have $1.00. That doesn’t include the tea I drank. I at alot of light snacks (low cal cereal, baked potato, rice). Finally, I left the house, just to take a break. That releive anxiety and my hunger.

Biked all the way to the grocery store to stalk up on some cheap fruits and veggies. This little break helped. I guess I replaced eating to releive anxiety with going outside? Also cheap low-cal high fiber food like carrots & apples. Staved off hunger. Phew.

So yah, this morning I was 201 LBS. I expect that goes up to 205 lbs after all the water I drink. But morning weight was good.

Hey everyone,

I jogged/ran Mon, Tues, Thurs. Wednesday rested.

I haven’t lost any weight since last week. I’m still 204/205ish. I blame Easter Sunday for the flip-flop this week, at least I didn’t gain!

Drinking lots of water too, my diet is 1300-1400 Calories. Trying to eat protein , not much in fridge as far as protein.

So far today, I had Fiber One Cereal, 1.5 cup of boiled corn, and a baked potato. I can eat a large dinner.

I haven’t wavered too much yet. We’ll see if I can stick to it.

Hey guys, gals,

Jogged 4 mins, ran 1 min 15s, two 3km laps around park. 6 Km total. Took 40-50 mins. Was 6C, windy. Got somewhat sweaty. Wind slowed me down. Got encouraged by a walker, well he asked me how far I was going. Saw some familiar joggers, I waved, they smiled slightly. Not much to say have they?

Slept in (W 9:30 am), up late last night doing take home exam (To 12:15am). Tomorrow, Political Geography Exam, Today Political Geography assignment due, my project is in final stages. Main task of day. Still looking for summer work. A new job could mess up my fitness routine.

Tomorrow exam during my jogging / running time. Will I get a jog in?

Busy day, must go.

Issues/Injury:

a. Wore athletic socks. Second littlest toe on left foot got blistered, slight bleeding. Ventilation in shoe or shoe size?

b. Soreness on right side of torso around liver, upper abs. Goes away after jogging.

Did intervals. Brought stop watch. 4 min jog. 1 min run. Repeated until one hour elapsed. I finished three laps around park on 3km trail in 1 hour. Not sure if it is fast or not. But everyone starts somewhere. I feel worked. Was really aggressive when running, helped me keep going. I was like… GRRRRR when I was running.

Temperature was 6C went up to 8C. Was cold to start but by time I was finishing I felt like I could stip my hoodie off. Got encouraged by a walker. Felt great.

Warm up was stretching, as well as cool down. Cool down included walk. Stretches included touching toes, splits, pulling leg up back side, rotating shoulders…

 Issues/Injury:

a. My left knee cap felt stiff, sometimes sore. Felt better after 1 hour. Magazine says ice if it is an issue. Do I have bad form?

b. Toes blistered, assuming it is ventalation in shoes. Should wear athletic socks next time. Blisters could be due to poor choice of shoe, not sure.

c. When running fast, soreness below ribs, could be lung muscles, or upper abs.  Sometimes it favours one side. Stomach or liver area. Not sure whats going on. Only happens when I run. Is it back form? Poor fitness?

d. Noticed running requires greater concentration on muscles, sometimes I ponder, and start thinking. When head is in clouds, running is slow.

Exercise Log

Hi all,

Easter sunday could have been the diet breaker and I tried to cut back. It could have been worse but I did indulge.  There is a picture which explains what I ate to this. The beer was the worse part. I’m really worried about a beer belly! 6 beers. *gulp* My cousins kept on egging me to drink beer. I wasn’t drinking alone though. But it was bad… Budwiser after budwiser.

Second worst was the cake… had a small peice though. Cheese sandwitch… bad idea… well at least I didn’t have seconds.

It was hard this morning stopping myself from eating like a pig… thats what happens when you feast the day before.

see: http://heavyarms.buddyslim.com/files/2009/04/easterdamage.JPG